Rated XXX

[Kira & Lee Norris]

"Lee."
Shut up.
"Lee."
"Shut him up."
"Lee."
Shut UP.
"Lee!"
"What?!" Lee snapped, sitting upwards. "What do you want Jack?"
His friend's boyish grin visibly wilted at Lee's sharp response, and Lee felt a pang of guilt. He cleared his throat, but found that it was hard to be genuinely apologetic.
"His fault."
"What is it, Jack?"
"Madeleine's here."
Lee jumped, swerving around to see his girlfriend and Olivia coming into the room. If they were just arriving... then what had Jack actually wanted to talk about?
"Hi, Maddie!" called Lee.
"Hi, Olivia," winked Jack.

[Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford]

"Do you insist on wearing clothes like that, Olivia?"
Olivia rolled her eyes at her friend. "Just because you happen to like dressing like a nun..."
Okay, she didn't mean it. Not really. Well...
"Hardly!" Madeleine exclaimed in outrage.
Her top wasn't really that low. Well... anyway, it wasn't as though she wasn't wearing a bra, or anything. And the heels weren't that high, not really.
Olivia'd bet anything that Madeleine was just sore because it made her another three inches taller than her. Though the problem could really be easily solved.
"Fine, not a nun then. Something else conservative. Lee must be so frustrated with-"
Before the sentence could be finished, she'd recieved a hefty whack on the arm from Madeleine, which hurt a lot more than she probably meant it to.
Rubbing it, and already feeling the bruise, she smiled sweetly down at her. "Sorry..."
Pushing the door to the common room, Olivia's lips curved into a sly grin as she saw her boyfriend sitting near Lee.
"Oh, look!" she said, watching the look of resignation cross Madeleine's face with amusement.
Lee's voice carried over to them. "Hi, Maddie!"
Jack winked across at her. "Hi, Olivia."
Madeleine shuddered at that, and Olivia had to stifle a laugh.
"Hey," she said, winking back and Jack and smoothly walking forward and sliding down on the couch beside him.

[Kira & Lee Norris]

Olivia's long, toned legs crossed over, showing them off properly. Jack smirked at Lee, although he didn't quite make eye contact, and his hand slid comfortably across Olivia's thigh; caressing it lovingly. Lee stood up and crossed the room to slip his arms around Maddie's waist, kissing her softly on the lips.
"Okay, should we get out of here now?" he whispered.
"Lee, Madeleine, you should stay with us," Jack called wickedly.
Lee cursed in her ear. "Darn."
"Come on, guys!"
Gee, he was persistant.

[Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford]

Dammit," Olivia heard Madeleine curse softly, and she smiled as Jack's hand slid further up her bare thigh and feeling a little sorry for Madeleine because yes, she was wearing a skirt.
Only a little, mind.
"Yes, come over here guys," she cooed, stretching out her leg and gently toeing the armchair opposite them.
Madeleine rolled her eyes, and taking Lee's hands, led him over to the armchair, where she perched on the arm of it.
"So, do you have something that you want to talk to us about, or is the point of this just to torment us again?" she asked them, narrowing her eyes a little as Jack's hand moved slightly.

[Kira & Lee Norris]

Jack's fingers were like hooks. He was very nearly clawing up Olivia's skirt.
But goddamit, she did have good legs.
"I don't know," mused Jack, looking at Olivia. "Should we torture them?"

[Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford]

Olivia cocked her head and smiled innocently at Madeleine.
"You do and I'm leaving," Madeleine threatened, sliding her arm over Lee's and entwining her hand with his.
Olivia laughed and turned her smile on Jack. "Maybe a little?"

[Kira & Lee Norris]

Jack caught Lee's look, and smiled at Olivia, kissing her cheek.
"Just don't lick her," Lee blurted out before he could stop himself.
Jack rolled his eyes. "That a challenge?"
There was somewhat an edge to his voice. Jack really was angry with him. What had he wanted to talk about anyway?
"Probably sports. Buffoon."
Lee gulped, suddenly hating the woman inside his head.
He smiled at Jack instead. "You do love a challenge..."
"Where?"
Oh god no...
"Um... do I have to answer?"
Jack just grinned.

[Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford]

Olivia laughed as Madeleine rolled her eyes. "You guys are so..."
"Disgusting?" she finished happily, moving and sliding onto Jack's lap. "I know, but give me some credit. I'm a Carer, I have to have fun somehow."
Okay, so she didn't hate it that much. Well, she'd rather have been a Spy, really, but it didn't matter.
"So, where then, Lee?" she asked, smiling wickedly at him.

[Kira & Lee Norris]

"Ladie's choice," muttered Lee. "Jack, by the way- was there something you wanted to...?"
He trailed off at the sudden brightness in Jack's eyes.
"You shouldn't have asked!"
"I can get you a place on the football team!" Jack replied, swivelling around so the Olivia slid off his knees with a dull thud. "Easy enough- you're speedy. You can take a punch or two. I think you could do it, Lee, I really do-"

[Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford]

Olivia snorted as she slid down Jack's legs and landed on the floor, momentarily sidetracked from his sudden switch to sports. "Lee? Football? Are you sure - I mean, no offence, Lee, but -"
"Oh, shush," Madeleine said, fondly stroking Lee's hair, but Olivia's quick eyes didn't fail to notice the slightly worried look on her face. "He'd be better at it that you, at any rate."
Olivia pouted at her. "I'm a Carer. Everyone is better at football than me. Besides, can you play football in heels? I think not. Speaking of which..." She got up from the ground and positioned herself on Jack's lap again, curling her legs around his waist.
No matter how many times Madeline talked about "freaky New Age stuff" - yoga could sure as hell come in useful.
"Jack," she said, turning her pout on him. "Sports - we talked about this. I gave you an ultimatum, remember?"

[Kira & Lee Norris]

He pecked her on the lips. "Duly noted, ma'am- but you do need to remember that talking about sports and playing sports is important. Lee wants to hear about this- don' cha' buddy?"
"Call me buddy again and Maddie will grind your head into the dirt," Lee replied darkly, nudging Maddie. "You will, right?"

[Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford]

"Definitely," Madeleine replied, an amused tone in her voice at that. "I know I'm shorter than you, Jack, but I could still take you."

[Kira & Lee Norris]

"We'll see," Jack said darkly, his eyes mocking slits as he surveyed her. "Olivia- do you think she could take me?"
Lee's eyebrows shot up. Watch out, Olivia. Tread carefully...

[Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford]

"Eh... um... well..." Olivia stammered, glancing between her friend and boyfriend.
Madeleine's power vs. Jack's muscles.
Best friend vs. boyfriend?
Tough one.
"Well... sorry Madeleine, but he is over a foot taller than you," she said, kissing Jack's lips.
Okay, she was a liar. Madeleine probably would be able to take Jack - with a bit of difficulty, but she'd do it...
They'd both probably know that she was just sucking up, though. After all, good things could come out of sucking up to Jack...

[Kira & Lee Norris]

Jack's eyes sparkled with triumph, and he gave Olivia's slim frame a brief- though strangely intimate- hug of gratitude.
"It's great you're a shrimp," Jack told Madeleine earnestly. "If you were like, 6 ft or something, you would officially be terrifying."
"And taller than me, which ain't so good," Lee chipped in. "At least this way, I can attempt to maintain the idea that my girlfriend can't beat me up."
"You're such a woman."
"You love it," Lee said wickedly, batting his eyelashes at Jack, who turned pale.