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Post by Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford on Jun 8, 2008 19:48:48 GMT
At that, Madeleine's colour rose higher. "Thank you," she said quietly. "That means a lot." After her mother's views on the topic, words of encouragement like that meant more than a lot. But still, she needed to stop blushing sometime soon. Besides, she was probably making Misa awkward. Swift change of subject? "And how are you and Dylan?"
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Post by misa on Jun 8, 2008 19:54:42 GMT
"We're fi-" Misa nearly choked on her words as her brain finally caught onto what the rest of her had second before. "People know about us?" Misa could feel her cheeks heating up, how on earth had that spread?
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Post by Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford on Jun 8, 2008 20:00:47 GMT
Interpreting Misa's blush as panic, Madeleine intervened quickly. "No, no, it hasn't spread or anything: Dylan told me. Don't worry." She understood Misa's panic, once things started to spread, the rumour could start to work, and it could be pretty vicious - after the whole Levi ... confusion, Madeleine knew that pretty well. And Misa was shy, and she and Dylan were obviously trying to keep their relationship private... She shook her head slightly. If only her lovelife was awarded the same privilege.
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Post by misa on Jun 17, 2008 16:43:46 GMT
"Oh, Dylan told you? I hadn't realised you knew each other," Misa wondered why Dylan had never mentioned being friends with Madeleine to her before now. Perhaps he had, she was so easily distracted nowadays he could probably tell her he was going to shave all his hair off, get a nose ring, and join a cult and she wouldn't notice. It made her feel terrible to think about; she was such an a neglectful girlfriend. Not that Dylan didn't forgive her, they'd had this conversation not a few days before, but if anything his understanding only made her feel worse. Misa briefly wondered if Dylan had told Madeleine all about that too, if she knew more about the condition Misa was in these days than she was letting on. He told her on an all too frequent basis how ill she looked and he was the only one who she'd ever admit it to. Surely, he wouldn't betray her confidence like that...Wait, why on earth was she getting so suspicious and edgy about the idea; of course Dylan had friends so why wouldn't one of them be her head? It was no big deal, right? "So...how've things been?" Misa asked, trying to force the subject to the back of her mind.
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Post by Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford on Jun 27, 2008 18:15:11 GMT
"Things have been good," she said quietly, her fingers twisting around some more flora as she passed it. "I can't say everything is going perfectly; with all this... fighting, but I don't think it could really be any better than it's going under the circumstances." Russ could start being a bit easier on her, though. It would make everyone feel at least a little bit better, woudln't it? "And you?" she asked, careful not to let her concern for Misa slip into her voice.
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Post by misa on Jul 1, 2008 21:45:59 GMT
Misa nodded gently as Madeleine spoke, nothing seemed to be easy for anyone anymore; of course Madeleine was no exception. Had it ever been easy for Madeleine? Had it ever been easy for anyone round here? "And you?" Madeleine asked, and Misa could hear the careful measurement of her voice. "Absolutely fantastic!" Misa exclaimed too quickly, her voice about an octave higher than it ought to have been and so sachrine sweet the words almost made her gag. "Never better," Liar.
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Post by Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford on Jul 1, 2008 22:09:39 GMT
It was too quick, too eager. It was very clear to Madeleine that Misa was not absolutely fantastic. In actual fact, it looked to be quite the opposite. "Are you sure, Misa?" she asked, quietly. "You haven't... I don't know, you haven't seemed yourself lately." Christ, was she bad at this. It was bloody lucky that she hadn't been made a Carer. Maddie was never good at talking to people about things like this. She always froze up. It was like the hugging thing. No matter how much the situation called for it, hugs were out. But Misa really, really looked like she could use a hug, so Madeleine was going to try her best. Whether the best was good enough was debatable, though. "I don't mean to be nosy, or anything," she added apologetically. "I've been a bit worried about you, that's all." Oh, Jesus, Madeleine, you are so crap at this.
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Post by misa on Jul 1, 2008 22:40:12 GMT
"Are you sure, Misa?" Madeleine asked, quietly. Well, she could hardly have been expected to accept Misa's answer could she? A five year old with a new balloon wouldn't have been fooled by that "You haven't... I don't know, you haven't seemed yourself lately." The smile on Misa's face froze. It suddenly felt, if possible, ten times more plastic, more false -like it had been drawn in red crayon by the same five year old. It would have been all too easy to just let it drop and tell Madeleine just how bad she felt, how she didn't even know who she was anymore, never mind where "herself" was these days. But she couldn't. She was in too deep, too far out to sea with no lifeline. It was too late to reclaim whatever self it was she'd lost; Misa knew she could never come out the other side of all this mess the same as when she entered it. "I don't mean to be nosy, or anything," Madeleine added. "I've been a bit worried about you, that's all." It made Misa cringe inside. Madeleine shouldn't be worrying about her considering everything else she had to worry about, she didn't need Misa's problems atop all she was already dealing with, a pile, Misa didn't doubt was mountainous. "You don't need to worry about me; there's nothing to worry about. And besides, you have enough worries of your own,"
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Post by Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford on Jul 11, 2008 18:59:46 GMT
Crap. Maybe she'd gone about that the wrong way. "Don't worry about my problems, Misa," she said softly. "My problems are shared by enough others that it means they're not solely on my shoulders." Well... maybe that was bending the truth slightly, but it was a necessary white lie, and it was believable enough. After all, Misa didn't know what these problems were - she must be referring to the whole leading an army 'problem', which was true - it could be a problem - but she had help from Hoodham and Professor Raven. It was a worry shared. "But I am worried about you," she continued. "I mean, after what happened in Maths in January... I know you mightn't want to tell me, but it's important... has this happened since then?" Her voice was quiet, gentle, encouraging, hiding much of just how worried Madeleine was, in case it scared Misa. It looked like she'd been scared enough.
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Post by misa on Jul 18, 2008 20:47:31 GMT
God, how had she done that? Just... made the incision and gone straight for the jugular, made it to the one question Misa wouldn't be able to ramble around like that in a motion swifter than that of any samurai. "It has... a few times. But," she could feel the lie rising up in her throat like bile, word vomit, that no matter how little she wanted to she was going to have to accept and deal with, "nothing major. I've been... controling it." It wasn't completely dishonest. The part about her control was completely true... the proof was in the hideous bags beneath her eyes that, although it was beyond her belief, continued to darken. It was in the hollows her cheeks had become. It was in the fact she couldn't remember what happened yesterday, or what day it was or how long a day was as they all blended together for her. Regardless, the small lie, all two words of it, left her tongue charcoal black and a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach.
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Post by Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford on Jul 18, 2008 21:00:05 GMT
Madeleine put her hands to her hair and ran them through it, exhaling. "That's not... it's not the point. They shouldn't be happening at all, Misa, regardless of whether you can control it or not. It shouldn't - it shouldn't happen." No, it dámn well shouldn't. By now, Madeleine was certain that these weren't simply dreams, or even fits. Someone was doing this. She didn't know who it was, or even why... ... wait. No, no that couldn't be it. No, stop it. Come on, this is Misa. She'd be smart enough to recognise that. "How bad are they?" she asked quietly. "Are they still making you bleed, or any of that?"
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Post by misa on Jul 19, 2008 11:04:44 GMT
Misa sighed, she didn't like to think about what they did to her physically. Not only was the lack of sleep messing her up, but on top of that she was still having the fits frequently. Not that she was going to say that to Madeleine. If Madeleine was going to assume that she counted the dreams and fits as the same thing, well, that was just fine.
"Erm, sometimes. Mainly, it's just the pain of when it happens and then if I'm in the wrong place at the time and I fall or something there are... a few bruises and cuts. But, that's just my own clumsiness, really." She coughed awkwardly, it was so embarrassing talking about just how weak she was with another person, particularly one as strong as Madeleine. A few bruises and cuts. A bit of an understatement considering her entire left side was currently covered in ghastly purple bruising, courtesy of an unpleasant incident at the top of a mercifully deserted staircase on Tuesday, which ended at the bottom and in painful collision with the banister.
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Post by Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford on Jul 21, 2008 17:33:07 GMT
Her own clumsiness?! Madeleine's hands tightened on her hair, almost tearing strands of it out in anger. It wasn't directed at Misa, God, no, but because she believed that this was her own fault. As though she had in some way deserved people messing about with her mind. Or as though she'd invited them in, or was deliberately encouraging them. God save us. "Bruises and cuts? Can I see them?" Just a few bruises and cuts... Madeleine doubted it. Doubted it very much. So she needed to find out for herself. And since Misa was doubtlessly still refusing to visit the Carers, Madeleine may even be able to try and heal them a little. As though that was going to make it any better, but at least she could try, if this failed to work.
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Post by misa on Jul 21, 2008 18:56:43 GMT
"Bruises and cuts? Can I see them?" Misa sighed. Well, there was no point in hiding them was there? It was strange she thought as she came to a halt. Months ago she wouldn't have dared even mention their exsistence. This was bearing down on her so hard it was wearing her down. "I suppose," she said quietly, then checking no one was around she pulled up the left side of her shirt and looked away. She already knew how bad it looked, just because she was showing someone else didn't mean she had to see it again, too.
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Post by Madeleine Baudelaire&Russ Ford on Jul 21, 2008 20:01:41 GMT
Madeleine swore quickly as Misa raised the side of her shirt. The bruise was long, probably stretching most of the way up Misa's side, and a deep, thunder-coloured violet, with the customary yellowing at the edges. It was large, and probably very, very painful. She must wince every time someone even brushed against her. "Oh, Christ, Misa." Oh, very sensitive handling of it, Madeleine. Very well bloody done. She bit her lip, looking back up at Misa's face, which was averted. Maybe she didn't want to see her bruise - or maybe she just didn't want to see Madeleine's reaction to it, which was understandable, really. Madeleine wouldn't want to see it either. She looked back at again, wincing automatically. "I can heal it, if you like - but how did that happen?"
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