Post by The Delaney Twins on Jul 10, 2008 22:22:25 GMT
Lyndsey (“Sally”) Erin Delaney
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My sister, the sociopath. Some of you may be thinking that your eyes are deceiving you. They are not. That is a tarantula. That is my sister pointing at it and smiling. I mean, God - I know she likes animals, but seriously! Not even Dr Dolittle could find something to love in that thi-
Wait. Hold on. This is the first picture, isn’t it? Not fair! How come Sally gets to go first?
Awk, Kennedy, just because you were too scared. I mean, Jesus, I know spiders aren't the most pleasant thing in the world, but it was in a goddam cage! It's hardly just going to come skittering on out.
Anyway, as you may have figured out, that’s me, there, in the zoo last summer - pretty near our birthday, actually, I think, although obviously not on our actual birthday. Kennedy would not be impressed with a zoo trip on our birthday, right, darling little brother?
Kenny took that picture for me – and by the way, cretin, I got to go first because I’m older. So there.
Kennedy Matthew Delaney
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Well, it’s my turn now. Regarding my hair in this picture – DO NOT LIKE. I guess that’s what you get when your haircuts are decided by some American actor instead of yourself.
A little bit ironic, I think, that he calls me a poser considering this photograph. He doesn’t look that good in real life, you know, he’s just learned how to airbrush himself on Photoshop. Also, the hat, Ken? Seriously?
Hey, what's wrong with the hat?
Sigh.
William Thomas Delaney
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That’s our dad – well, our dad before Sally convinced him to shave his beard. I think that was a smart move for all involved.
Daddy dearest. He’s just like an older guitar-playing version of Kennedy. It’s a little scary, really. Oh, and speaking of Kennedy – little brother, there is such thing as the ‘zoom out’ button. Y’know, just because you have the internet in your head doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re good with technology.
Shut up.
Margaret Alison Delaney
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Mum looks a little scared there… Well, she’s not really a camera person. Or really an anything-person. She’s the quietest of all of us – but that’s not to say she can’t hold her own in a fight. Not once have I managed to convince her to let me off anything since we met her. It’s a little upsetting.
That’s our mum, there. It’s a more recent picture than the photo of my dad – we took his picture just a couple of weeks after we… Yeah. Anyway, that’s her at Aunt Anne’s house, which should explain the horrible yellow sofa. Aunt Anne likes to pretend the seventies never ended.
ALSO. Notice, please, that neither of my parents have freckles. In fact, dad is downright tanned. The question remains - where did I get them from? Life is truly not fair.
Arihant whose-surname-we-can’t-remember
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Cr*p, we really need to ask him what his full name is.
Well. Never mind. The picture.
Oh my Lord. Words cannot fully explain the lengths we had to go to in order to get this photo. Ari is, needless to say, extremely, extremely difficult when it comes to cameras. I don’t think I have a single picture of him that he actually realised I was taking.
I know, it’s really irritating. Anyway, for this one, we created a diversion, because Arihant knew we were trying to get a photo of him and as such was ‘on his guard.’ So, Kennedy subtly hid the camera in his coat while I ran off to the side. My brother had all sorts of strange –
Fantastic.
- strange ideas about what I should do to attract his attention, but it turned out that just yelling at him was enough, which is why he looks so “Mr Dangerous is ready to fight” there. In all the other photos he looks like a startled puppy.
Sally, he always looks like a startled puppy.
May Eleanor Clarke
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Look, it’s May! Wow, she looks beautiful. I love this photo of her.
Pervert. This is my friend and Ken’s obsession, May. She lives down in Cardsdale as of now – works in the school canteen.
Joyce Abigail Mason
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And heeeeeeeere's Jamie!
Yeah. Because you really have to reference The Shining when you're talking about my best friend.
Well, if it were anyone else, I'd agree with you. As it is, it's kind of appropriate, no?
Oh, for God's sake...
Well, anyways, Jamie is - despite what my brother may tell you - a lovely girl. An Academic. That picture there is from the day she first met Ari - in a wonderful display that gave all watching serious inferiority complexes, she picked up the violin in about... an hour, I think?
Oh, and speaking of inferiority complexes, I stand by my theory that that is the reason for my darling brother's... issues with her.
And not anything to do with the fact that she's the spawn of Satan or anything like that, obviously.
Caspar Michaël van der Berg
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Cassandra dearest. Maybe you should field this one, Sally?
Yeah, probably.
Anyway, so, I feel I should start off by saying that this is my favourite picture of Cass, like, ever. It's just him all over - i.e., the part of him that does a lot of completely random crap completely straight-faced while conveniently ignoring the fact that the rest of the room - or department store, in this case - thinks he's insane.
We, um... well, we dated, for a while, but that's over now. We're just friends. He went back to Amsterdam, it was... messy. Sort of. Anyway.
What's next?
Terrence Delaney
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The devil incarnate. And he lives with us now. I'm just thrilled, can't you tell?
I had to take him back here! You think we can trust mum and dad to look after a living creature? They walked him on a bloody treadmill!
And why is this my problem, Sally?
Call yourself a man, being scared of a dog...
Anyway, this is Terry, not Terrence. It's not greatly surprising that I had to modify the fruity name my parents gave him in some way - it's bad enough for a person to be called that, but an animal? That's cruel. But I won't report them to the RSPCA, because blood is thicker than water and all that jazz.
Still, though. The thought is tempting.
