Post by Jude Dorrian on Mar 1, 2008 14:38:45 GMT
ooc: Urgh, stupid angsty pile of pudding that is Jude's past. If it's bad, I'm sorry, but my spirit has died a little recently. But whatever. Here it is anyway...
“Hey, Jude.”
“Hey, Dakota,” he said, looking up in surprise.
He hadn’t heard her approach; but how could he not have? He always heard people approach, their footsteps magnified ten-fold as they echoed towards him. Jude automatically sat up straighter, his eyes scanning his surroundings quickly.
The slabs of stone that made up the winding path through the gardens were grainy to the touch; dirt and dust congregated there in smooth, thin layers. If your footsteps crossed it, there was always a crunch. She hadn’t followed the path. So, then what? Those stones; the pebbles that swirled in decorative patches around the plants; any pressure on them made them shift, and scratch against each other as they rolled. Little indents appeared across the pebbles; marking the steps of those who had come walking in the Gardens this morning. Jude could see his own little trail, past the statue of Karise Hoodham; and the point where he’d paused to read the inscription beside her statue, because there, the pebbles sank a little deeper. But Dakota…
Dakota had not crossed the pebbles.
Then she must’ve crossed the grass from behind him. One glance behind him told him this was true. Today, it was soft, wet and wild; drenched in dew and blown about by the wind. Whatever path she had made across the grass was already covered; the blades rustled back to life by the fierce wind that continued to howl around them.
“Jude?”
“Mmm?”
“What are y’all doing?”
“Sorry,” he shook his head, and gestured towards the space on the bench beside him. “Sit down. I was reading- I just didn’t hear y’all coming.”
“Too lost in the book?”
“Or the wind,” he said, smiling. “Makes me think of hurricane season.”
Dakota smiled weakly, but still she didn’t sit down. Jude closed his book, frowning at her. It was her eyes he focused on; something there was misplaced; some kind of shadow, just waiting to get out...
“Dakota?”
“Jude, I think I should go to someone about my scars.”
Bang.
The bullet dropped, and dragged Jude’s heart down with it, because he hadn’t had a chance to dodge it. There’d been no forewarning. This just wasn’t fair.
“Why would you do that?”
“Because they’re ugly,” Dakota’s voice dropped, and her arms folded across her chest, hugging herself. “And they remind me of the… what he… what he did to us.”
“Dakota...” he bit his lip, inhaling deeply. “Dakota, you know they’re permanent. And people have tried to heal them before.”
“They can’t be permanent, Jude,” she said, sinking down beside him, her arms tightening around her. They were black; covered by the long sleeves of her coat. The only part of her that was exposed was her face.
As per usual.
“They fade,” Jude said, rubbing his own arm automatically. “They’ve faded for me.”
She snorted. “Sure they have. He was paying you. Y’all were a business customer. Y’all were worth something to him. He made sure he did it carefully, and cleanly when he took your blood. But not me, Jude. I didn’t get that choice.”
His fingers tightened slightly, the nails digging into his arm.
“They’re all over me.”
His lips moved slightly. “I know.”
“Everywhere. Stupid, purple, ugly cuts. Stupid red marks. Stupid half-healed holes.”
“I know.”
“Raw, you know? You got a needle, Jude. But as for me? My flesh was clawed open.”
“I know.”
“And it was worse for me and the girls too; because we were girls,” her voice trembled slightly. “Y’all… y’all know what he could be like.”
Jude closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. “Yeah. I know.”
“Jay?”
“What?”
She flinched, looking almost ashamed as she tore her eyes from him. “I was just a kid. I was six when it started, Jay. I was six.”
“When he found you.”
“When he found me,” she said softly, bowing her head. “Jay… I thought he…. When he… he seemed so nice, so he did. Caleb Hoole was the greatest man I’d ever met- he was special, like a hero. Like Superman.” She smiled slightly. “I thought he could be like my Papa. My own, real live Papa. And me- Mary- I’d be his little girl.”
Jude raised his head slightly. He’d heard the story before… but it didn’t make it any easier. It didn’t stop the images falling in front of him like a movie; watching her, the young Dakota, lifted out of the gutter and promised the world from whom Jude considered…
Whom Jude knew was-
“Boy, I was in for a real shock when my-” she snorted- “Papa dropped me in a cage at the warehouse with 30 other kids to let me rot. Because I was magic; because I could do these special things… he’d seen me, playing with my magic. That’s how he found me. And me and the others- we were scum- street kids nobody would miss.”
“Dakota, y’all don’t have to talk about this.”
His steel blue eyes met hers; her bleak black gaze, and told her so, over and over. That she didn’t have to talk. Jude didn’t have to listen. He knew it all. She didn’t have to-
“I need to learn to talk. I have to accept it. Get over it. Jay, I won’t bury it.” She shook her head, almost as though confirming it to herself. “I won’t bury it.”
“I’m not asking you to-”
“Jay.” A small smile suddenly appeared, throwing him completely. “Y’all don’t have to worry about me anymore.”
Jude stood up suddenly, turning around to face her. “Dakota, I don’t want Tameron to have to know about all this. I know I said it was okay… but
I don’t think… what Caleb did…”
“Took my blood; took your’s,” she said softly. “Turned us into a drug trade- a magic trade- yeah, Jude. I know what you mean.”
Did she?
“Not that. I mean, you know… you know I never wanted to leave you.”
“Well, I’m out now, ain’t I?” she said lightly standing up. “That’s all that matters.”
“I couldn’t help it,” he said, his voice strangely dull. “I couldn’t… Caleb stopped me. He knew about Tameron. He said he’d get her if I didn’t keep my mouth shut. And I was scared; I knew Dad couldn’t protect her. I knew I had to.”
Dakota’s smile was still there; still confusing him. He didn’t like the way it made him felt; so uneasy, so worthless- and his apologies seemed so pathetic. He’d been ten- he’d been a kid- but he should’ve… maybe if he’d-
Jude had too many regrets, was all.
“We were kids, Jay,” she said, turning away. “I forgave you long ago- I knew y’all couldn’t help it. I knew your sister came first.”
“Dakota, I-”
“Jay, I’m going to ask about the scars, okay? Maybe there’ll be something for yours. You shouldn’t have that memory engraved on you for the rest of your life…” As she spoke, she walked, and her voice began to fade. Suddenly, the wind stirred again, its howls beginning to attack them both.
She was lost to it; if she was saying anything, he couldn’t tell; and the grass beneath her feet covered her path as she walked away. And he couldn’t hear her footsteps, that were still so light and familiar.
But Dakota had never made much noise.
Dakota had learned from an early age it was always best not to scream.
“Hey, Jude.”
“Hey, Dakota,” he said, looking up in surprise.
He hadn’t heard her approach; but how could he not have? He always heard people approach, their footsteps magnified ten-fold as they echoed towards him. Jude automatically sat up straighter, his eyes scanning his surroundings quickly.
The slabs of stone that made up the winding path through the gardens were grainy to the touch; dirt and dust congregated there in smooth, thin layers. If your footsteps crossed it, there was always a crunch. She hadn’t followed the path. So, then what? Those stones; the pebbles that swirled in decorative patches around the plants; any pressure on them made them shift, and scratch against each other as they rolled. Little indents appeared across the pebbles; marking the steps of those who had come walking in the Gardens this morning. Jude could see his own little trail, past the statue of Karise Hoodham; and the point where he’d paused to read the inscription beside her statue, because there, the pebbles sank a little deeper. But Dakota…
Dakota had not crossed the pebbles.
Then she must’ve crossed the grass from behind him. One glance behind him told him this was true. Today, it was soft, wet and wild; drenched in dew and blown about by the wind. Whatever path she had made across the grass was already covered; the blades rustled back to life by the fierce wind that continued to howl around them.
“Jude?”
“Mmm?”
“What are y’all doing?”
“Sorry,” he shook his head, and gestured towards the space on the bench beside him. “Sit down. I was reading- I just didn’t hear y’all coming.”
“Too lost in the book?”
“Or the wind,” he said, smiling. “Makes me think of hurricane season.”
Dakota smiled weakly, but still she didn’t sit down. Jude closed his book, frowning at her. It was her eyes he focused on; something there was misplaced; some kind of shadow, just waiting to get out...
“Dakota?”
“Jude, I think I should go to someone about my scars.”
Bang.
The bullet dropped, and dragged Jude’s heart down with it, because he hadn’t had a chance to dodge it. There’d been no forewarning. This just wasn’t fair.
“Why would you do that?”
“Because they’re ugly,” Dakota’s voice dropped, and her arms folded across her chest, hugging herself. “And they remind me of the… what he… what he did to us.”
“Dakota...” he bit his lip, inhaling deeply. “Dakota, you know they’re permanent. And people have tried to heal them before.”
“They can’t be permanent, Jude,” she said, sinking down beside him, her arms tightening around her. They were black; covered by the long sleeves of her coat. The only part of her that was exposed was her face.
As per usual.
“They fade,” Jude said, rubbing his own arm automatically. “They’ve faded for me.”
She snorted. “Sure they have. He was paying you. Y’all were a business customer. Y’all were worth something to him. He made sure he did it carefully, and cleanly when he took your blood. But not me, Jude. I didn’t get that choice.”
His fingers tightened slightly, the nails digging into his arm.
“They’re all over me.”
His lips moved slightly. “I know.”
“Everywhere. Stupid, purple, ugly cuts. Stupid red marks. Stupid half-healed holes.”
“I know.”
“Raw, you know? You got a needle, Jude. But as for me? My flesh was clawed open.”
“I know.”
“And it was worse for me and the girls too; because we were girls,” her voice trembled slightly. “Y’all… y’all know what he could be like.”
Jude closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. “Yeah. I know.”
“Jay?”
“What?”
She flinched, looking almost ashamed as she tore her eyes from him. “I was just a kid. I was six when it started, Jay. I was six.”
“When he found you.”
“When he found me,” she said softly, bowing her head. “Jay… I thought he…. When he… he seemed so nice, so he did. Caleb Hoole was the greatest man I’d ever met- he was special, like a hero. Like Superman.” She smiled slightly. “I thought he could be like my Papa. My own, real live Papa. And me- Mary- I’d be his little girl.”
Jude raised his head slightly. He’d heard the story before… but it didn’t make it any easier. It didn’t stop the images falling in front of him like a movie; watching her, the young Dakota, lifted out of the gutter and promised the world from whom Jude considered…
Whom Jude knew was-
“Boy, I was in for a real shock when my-” she snorted- “Papa dropped me in a cage at the warehouse with 30 other kids to let me rot. Because I was magic; because I could do these special things… he’d seen me, playing with my magic. That’s how he found me. And me and the others- we were scum- street kids nobody would miss.”
“Dakota, y’all don’t have to talk about this.”
His steel blue eyes met hers; her bleak black gaze, and told her so, over and over. That she didn’t have to talk. Jude didn’t have to listen. He knew it all. She didn’t have to-
“I need to learn to talk. I have to accept it. Get over it. Jay, I won’t bury it.” She shook her head, almost as though confirming it to herself. “I won’t bury it.”
“I’m not asking you to-”
“Jay.” A small smile suddenly appeared, throwing him completely. “Y’all don’t have to worry about me anymore.”
Jude stood up suddenly, turning around to face her. “Dakota, I don’t want Tameron to have to know about all this. I know I said it was okay… but
I don’t think… what Caleb did…”
“Took my blood; took your’s,” she said softly. “Turned us into a drug trade- a magic trade- yeah, Jude. I know what you mean.”
Did she?
“Not that. I mean, you know… you know I never wanted to leave you.”
“Well, I’m out now, ain’t I?” she said lightly standing up. “That’s all that matters.”
“I couldn’t help it,” he said, his voice strangely dull. “I couldn’t… Caleb stopped me. He knew about Tameron. He said he’d get her if I didn’t keep my mouth shut. And I was scared; I knew Dad couldn’t protect her. I knew I had to.”
Dakota’s smile was still there; still confusing him. He didn’t like the way it made him felt; so uneasy, so worthless- and his apologies seemed so pathetic. He’d been ten- he’d been a kid- but he should’ve… maybe if he’d-
Jude had too many regrets, was all.
“We were kids, Jay,” she said, turning away. “I forgave you long ago- I knew y’all couldn’t help it. I knew your sister came first.”
“Dakota, I-”
“Jay, I’m going to ask about the scars, okay? Maybe there’ll be something for yours. You shouldn’t have that memory engraved on you for the rest of your life…” As she spoke, she walked, and her voice began to fade. Suddenly, the wind stirred again, its howls beginning to attack them both.
She was lost to it; if she was saying anything, he couldn’t tell; and the grass beneath her feet covered her path as she walked away. And he couldn’t hear her footsteps, that were still so light and familiar.
But Dakota had never made much noise.
Dakota had learned from an early age it was always best not to scream.
