Post by Kira & Lee Norris on Sept 14, 2007 17:41:05 GMT
Kira flopped down beside Lee on the sofa, sighing as she kicked off her shoes and leaned backward. Yes- it was Friday again, and not only that, but tonight it was the annual camping trip. She'd missed it the last two years, and was really excited about going to it. Not only that- she was excited about everyone finally being able to meet Deron.
It was almost a week now since their last meeting- and their first kiss. Her first kiss, ever. Kira had always said that she wanted her first kiss to be special, but she only really admitted that whenever she wasn't trying to repress the romantic side of her personality. And- as far as she was concerned- it couldn't get more special than Deron. Two years ago, Lee had had his first kiss, and confided in her later he wished it had been something... more. There was something gratifying about attaching a special sort of meaning to the first time your lips ever meet someone else's.
Funnily enough, Ellie had received the blessing of Lee's first kiss, and he'd received hers. They both laughed about it now- albeit awkwardly. They were at a friend's birthday party, and that particular friend had roped them into a game of 'Spin-the-Bottle'. They both really regretted it now, although Ellie did mention in passing once that Lee was a good kisser.
Because Kira had really needed that information.
She'd lived through Lee's stories of Gemma, Marli, Lily, Delilah and Madeleine- but now it was her turn to tell a story.
"Hi," she smiled, curling up on the sofa beside him. "How's your day been?"
Lee (who was reading a book on chess tactics- urgh, sometimes he pushed the limits of what was a nerd and what wasn't) set it aside and answered her with a weak smile. "Fine. Your's?"
"Fine," she replied, in a sing-song voice, though didn't fail to notice the sullenness of his tone.
She felt a twinge of guilt. She'd meant to ask Lee about him and Madeleine before now- something wasn't right, she could sense it. But she hadn't seen much of Lee this week- he'd spent most of it wrapped up in homework or chess, which he'd been teaching Chloe.
Funny thing was, she was really smart, but she took ages to learn the simplest move. Lee had to physically move her hand across the board to make sure she didn't do something silly like put her king in check. Kira guessed Chloe mustn't be a very logical thinker.
She hoped so, at any rate.
"I've got something to tell you," Kira said, after a moment's pause, her grin painfully wide. "I'm sorry I haven't told you before now, but I couldn't work out how to say it."
Lee narrowed his eyes suspiciously, but his smile betrayed his amusement. "Go on then, spit it out."
Kira mimed spitting, and received an elbow in the stomach.
"Say it," Lee said fondly. He seemed glad of the distraction, which was weird. Usually he got annoyed if she interrupted him in full chess-flow.
Kira took a deep breath, steadying her nerves, which had begun to race frantically around her head. Say it.
"You... remember Gemma, don't you?"
"My first girlfriend?" Lee frowned, turning to lean on his side so that he could face her. "Yes... of course... why?"
The hesitancy in his voice unsettled her for a moment. But it was just for a moment.
"I... kissed Deron."
Imagine tripping up in the middle of a forest, and falling forward into a massive pit of mud, where you kept falling and falling; sinking further and further and no matter how much you struggled, you couldn't get out. Imagine your frantic struggle as you writhed and fought, but alas, to no avail. Imagine that defeated, terrible feeling of, 'This is it. I'm done for'.
This was what Kira's silent panic attack felt like. Except, perhaps, to a greater extent of, "OH MY GOD- HELP!"
There was a minute's silence- Lee's face a frozen mask as he surveyed her. She blushed, biting her lip.
"Sorry."
"What for?"
She was reminded strongly of Deron, and grinned in spite of herself. "You mad? Upset? Creeped out?"
Lee didn't answer for a few more seconds, before inhaling deeply and smiling. "You kissed him."
"I kissed him," Kira giggled nervously.
"You... kissed Deron."
"Yes..."
"You... and him?"
"Yes."
"Okay," Lee shrugged.
Kira burst out laughing. Well, half-laughing. The nerves were still there, and she desperately wanted Lee's approval. "Okay?"
"Okay," he smiled faintly.
"I'm sorry, Lee," she said, hugging him.
After another pause (there seemed to be some sort of timer with them) his arms snaked around her, and he was hugging her back just as tightly. Letting go, she pulled away, her nerves now completely drizzling away.
"Be careful, yeah?" Lee said, sounding a little choked.
Kira felt like squealing and crying, "Aww!" now, but felt it would be a little OTT. Instead, she pressed her lips together, gave a curt nod, and held out her hand.
He laughed and shook it, putting on a deeper, gruffer voice. "Now, I don't want you two crazy kids getting into trouble- or that's the end of it. And I'll be meeting this young man- this Deron of your's, and keeping an eye on him."
"Darn," Kira sighed, punching the pillow. "Now I'll never be able to sleep with him knowing that you're tailing us."
Lee shuddered. "Okay- woah! Back up, cus, that's way too much information."
"As if you haven't seen me naked before," she waved it away, then snorted, realising by Lee's aghast expression how bad that must've sounded.
"We were two," he said weakly.
"I know," she said cheerfully. "Poor Lee."
"Poor me," he sighed, slumping in a resigned manner.
The slump triggered her memory. "You've looked like that all week."
Lee jumped as though he'd been scalded. "What?!"
"Slumping," Kira said slowly. "Miserable. Sad. Like a dog that's be hit on the nose with a newspaper. I said for you to talk to me- you didn't then, so talk now."
"Ah," Lee grimaced. "Right. I meant to. I just..."
"Put it off?" Kira volunteered.
"Like you put off telling me about you and Deron?"
She wrinkled her nose. "Touché."
"Saturday?"
She started. "Yes- why?"
"I followed you to his house," Lee sighed, slumping a little lower. "I was worried. I couldn't help it."
Kira would've blown up at him if it wasn't for the miserable look on his face. "Okay... why is that significant?"
"I just... thought I should tell you," Lee shrugged, trying and failing to look nonchalent. "Besides, Madeleine thought I should- "
Aha. There it was.
"Did you fight?" Kira said softly, leaning forward.
Lee took a deep breath, and nodded.
Kira swore under her breath. "Over me?"
"No," he shook his head. "I mean... augh... I don't know. It's more than that. It was about Chloe. And Levi."
Visions of chess-sets spun before her eyes. "Explain."
"Madeleine's jealous of Chloe," Lee said quietly, his voice a little hoarse. "And... she thinks that Chloe may have feelings for me, and that I return them."
By this stage, alarm bells were going off. The black and white squares of the board were flashing red.
"Do you?"
"Of course not!" cried Lee stoutly, jumping. "Chloe's my friend. I mean... sure, she's nice-looking and fun and stuff, but she's not..."
"She's not what?"
Lee sighed. "She's not Madeleine."
It was one of those deliriously romantic, but cheesy things that should really just be kept in those chick flick movies. At this point, Kira would've barfed. Perhaps she should've. Then Lee would've realised how stupidly worked up he was getting over some girl.
No, not some girl. Madeleine. She guessed that was the point. Anyone could see it from a mile off- even though it'd taken Kira a while to see it, and an even longer while before she managed to admit it to herself.
Lee was besotted. Infatuated. Falling in love.
Crazy, huh?
"Okay," sighed Kira. "So why haven't you told her this?"
Lee's face worked furiously. "Because..." Five more indistinguishable expressions flitted across it.
"Because?" she prompted.
Another five. "Because of Levi."
Oho ho ho... so the green snake of envy had slithered between them. "You're jealous of Levi?!"
He jumped at her angry cry. "I... well... yes."
Kira gaped at him. "Why?"
Lee half-shrugged. "I... I dunno... He's sort of always around and talking to her. And she talks about him lately too- always complaining. I mean, this probably doesn't make sense- "
"No, it doesn't."
"- but I can't help it. If I'm honest, it felt better when we were just 'sarcasm-and-punch' partners. Ever since we made this thing official, we've been arguing and- "
"Dear Lord, Lee!" cried Kira. "Are you afraid of commitment?"
"I- no- "
" 'Ever since we made this thing official?' " she repeated. "Official?! What kind of idiots are you?"
"The worst kind?" he offered, a little lamely.
Kira rolled her eyes. "No kidding."
"What would you have me do?"
So they were back to this. Lee, coming to Kira for advice. Sometimes, she felt she could murder him.
But then again, she always was happy to help.
"Have you apologised to her?"
"Yes, of course!" he cried. "But then we were both really awkward, and there were all these people- "
"Awkward?" Kira echoed his words hollowly. "You're going to let your relationship fall apart... because you feel awkward?"
"It's not that simple."
"Yes, Lee, it is!" cried Kira, jumping to her feet and rounding on him, her eyes blazing. "These things are very simple! Tell me how you feel about Madeleine!"
He blinked. "You know how I feel about her!"
"That's not an answer!"
"I..." Words failed him.
"There it is again, that awkwardness," muttered Kira darkly. "Ever heard of seizing the day? Just... going out into the world and taking control?"
"Yes. But it's hard."
"It doesn't have to be. You're the one making things difficult for yourself. You're both doing it- slinking around, making stupid accusations and arguing over trivial things because you won't face up to each other, and how you feel!"
There was a sudden silence. Kira presently became aware of how fast she was breathing, as though she'd just ran around the lake three or four times. Lee's head was bowed, his expression as unfathomable as ever. The seconds ticked by.
2... 4...6... 10... 20...
His head moved upwards; his blue eyes strangely dark in the flickering firelight.
"You're right," he said hoarsely. "I'm so stupid."
Kira felt a knot untie itself in her stomach. "You are."
"She's not... Levi doesn't...?"
"I doubt it," smiled Kira. "You should give her a chance."
Lee smiled back. "Thanks, Kira."
She pulled him to his feet, giving him a quick hug. "Any time."
"Tea time," he laughed. "C'mon, let's go..."
She nodded, and followed him out of the Common Room and downstairs.
If Deron's philosophy in life worked for him- for them- there was no reason why it shouldn't work out for Madeleine and Lee. A few nights ago, Madeleine had returned her question, asking Kira if she believed in soulmates. She still wasn't entirely sure of her answer, but she knew one thing.
With a bit of effort, and the odd helping hand, Madeleine and Lee could be it.
It was almost a week now since their last meeting- and their first kiss. Her first kiss, ever. Kira had always said that she wanted her first kiss to be special, but she only really admitted that whenever she wasn't trying to repress the romantic side of her personality. And- as far as she was concerned- it couldn't get more special than Deron. Two years ago, Lee had had his first kiss, and confided in her later he wished it had been something... more. There was something gratifying about attaching a special sort of meaning to the first time your lips ever meet someone else's.
Funnily enough, Ellie had received the blessing of Lee's first kiss, and he'd received hers. They both laughed about it now- albeit awkwardly. They were at a friend's birthday party, and that particular friend had roped them into a game of 'Spin-the-Bottle'. They both really regretted it now, although Ellie did mention in passing once that Lee was a good kisser.
Because Kira had really needed that information.
She'd lived through Lee's stories of Gemma, Marli, Lily, Delilah and Madeleine- but now it was her turn to tell a story.
"Hi," she smiled, curling up on the sofa beside him. "How's your day been?"
Lee (who was reading a book on chess tactics- urgh, sometimes he pushed the limits of what was a nerd and what wasn't) set it aside and answered her with a weak smile. "Fine. Your's?"
"Fine," she replied, in a sing-song voice, though didn't fail to notice the sullenness of his tone.
She felt a twinge of guilt. She'd meant to ask Lee about him and Madeleine before now- something wasn't right, she could sense it. But she hadn't seen much of Lee this week- he'd spent most of it wrapped up in homework or chess, which he'd been teaching Chloe.
Funny thing was, she was really smart, but she took ages to learn the simplest move. Lee had to physically move her hand across the board to make sure she didn't do something silly like put her king in check. Kira guessed Chloe mustn't be a very logical thinker.
She hoped so, at any rate.
"I've got something to tell you," Kira said, after a moment's pause, her grin painfully wide. "I'm sorry I haven't told you before now, but I couldn't work out how to say it."
Lee narrowed his eyes suspiciously, but his smile betrayed his amusement. "Go on then, spit it out."
Kira mimed spitting, and received an elbow in the stomach.
"Say it," Lee said fondly. He seemed glad of the distraction, which was weird. Usually he got annoyed if she interrupted him in full chess-flow.
Kira took a deep breath, steadying her nerves, which had begun to race frantically around her head. Say it.
"You... remember Gemma, don't you?"
"My first girlfriend?" Lee frowned, turning to lean on his side so that he could face her. "Yes... of course... why?"
The hesitancy in his voice unsettled her for a moment. But it was just for a moment.
"I... kissed Deron."
Imagine tripping up in the middle of a forest, and falling forward into a massive pit of mud, where you kept falling and falling; sinking further and further and no matter how much you struggled, you couldn't get out. Imagine your frantic struggle as you writhed and fought, but alas, to no avail. Imagine that defeated, terrible feeling of, 'This is it. I'm done for'.
This was what Kira's silent panic attack felt like. Except, perhaps, to a greater extent of, "OH MY GOD- HELP!"
There was a minute's silence- Lee's face a frozen mask as he surveyed her. She blushed, biting her lip.
"Sorry."
"What for?"
She was reminded strongly of Deron, and grinned in spite of herself. "You mad? Upset? Creeped out?"
Lee didn't answer for a few more seconds, before inhaling deeply and smiling. "You kissed him."
"I kissed him," Kira giggled nervously.
"You... kissed Deron."
"Yes..."
"You... and him?"
"Yes."
"Okay," Lee shrugged.
Kira burst out laughing. Well, half-laughing. The nerves were still there, and she desperately wanted Lee's approval. "Okay?"
"Okay," he smiled faintly.
"I'm sorry, Lee," she said, hugging him.
After another pause (there seemed to be some sort of timer with them) his arms snaked around her, and he was hugging her back just as tightly. Letting go, she pulled away, her nerves now completely drizzling away.
"Be careful, yeah?" Lee said, sounding a little choked.
Kira felt like squealing and crying, "Aww!" now, but felt it would be a little OTT. Instead, she pressed her lips together, gave a curt nod, and held out her hand.
He laughed and shook it, putting on a deeper, gruffer voice. "Now, I don't want you two crazy kids getting into trouble- or that's the end of it. And I'll be meeting this young man- this Deron of your's, and keeping an eye on him."
"Darn," Kira sighed, punching the pillow. "Now I'll never be able to sleep with him knowing that you're tailing us."
Lee shuddered. "Okay- woah! Back up, cus, that's way too much information."
"As if you haven't seen me naked before," she waved it away, then snorted, realising by Lee's aghast expression how bad that must've sounded.
"We were two," he said weakly.
"I know," she said cheerfully. "Poor Lee."
"Poor me," he sighed, slumping in a resigned manner.
The slump triggered her memory. "You've looked like that all week."
Lee jumped as though he'd been scalded. "What?!"
"Slumping," Kira said slowly. "Miserable. Sad. Like a dog that's be hit on the nose with a newspaper. I said for you to talk to me- you didn't then, so talk now."
"Ah," Lee grimaced. "Right. I meant to. I just..."
"Put it off?" Kira volunteered.
"Like you put off telling me about you and Deron?"
She wrinkled her nose. "Touché."
"Saturday?"
She started. "Yes- why?"
"I followed you to his house," Lee sighed, slumping a little lower. "I was worried. I couldn't help it."
Kira would've blown up at him if it wasn't for the miserable look on his face. "Okay... why is that significant?"
"I just... thought I should tell you," Lee shrugged, trying and failing to look nonchalent. "Besides, Madeleine thought I should- "
Aha. There it was.
"Did you fight?" Kira said softly, leaning forward.
Lee took a deep breath, and nodded.
Kira swore under her breath. "Over me?"
"No," he shook his head. "I mean... augh... I don't know. It's more than that. It was about Chloe. And Levi."
Visions of chess-sets spun before her eyes. "Explain."
"Madeleine's jealous of Chloe," Lee said quietly, his voice a little hoarse. "And... she thinks that Chloe may have feelings for me, and that I return them."
By this stage, alarm bells were going off. The black and white squares of the board were flashing red.
"Do you?"
"Of course not!" cried Lee stoutly, jumping. "Chloe's my friend. I mean... sure, she's nice-looking and fun and stuff, but she's not..."
"She's not what?"
Lee sighed. "She's not Madeleine."
It was one of those deliriously romantic, but cheesy things that should really just be kept in those chick flick movies. At this point, Kira would've barfed. Perhaps she should've. Then Lee would've realised how stupidly worked up he was getting over some girl.
No, not some girl. Madeleine. She guessed that was the point. Anyone could see it from a mile off- even though it'd taken Kira a while to see it, and an even longer while before she managed to admit it to herself.
Lee was besotted. Infatuated. Falling in love.
Crazy, huh?
"Okay," sighed Kira. "So why haven't you told her this?"
Lee's face worked furiously. "Because..." Five more indistinguishable expressions flitted across it.
"Because?" she prompted.
Another five. "Because of Levi."
Oho ho ho... so the green snake of envy had slithered between them. "You're jealous of Levi?!"
He jumped at her angry cry. "I... well... yes."
Kira gaped at him. "Why?"
Lee half-shrugged. "I... I dunno... He's sort of always around and talking to her. And she talks about him lately too- always complaining. I mean, this probably doesn't make sense- "
"No, it doesn't."
"- but I can't help it. If I'm honest, it felt better when we were just 'sarcasm-and-punch' partners. Ever since we made this thing official, we've been arguing and- "
"Dear Lord, Lee!" cried Kira. "Are you afraid of commitment?"
"I- no- "
" 'Ever since we made this thing official?' " she repeated. "Official?! What kind of idiots are you?"
"The worst kind?" he offered, a little lamely.
Kira rolled her eyes. "No kidding."
"What would you have me do?"
So they were back to this. Lee, coming to Kira for advice. Sometimes, she felt she could murder him.
But then again, she always was happy to help.
"Have you apologised to her?"
"Yes, of course!" he cried. "But then we were both really awkward, and there were all these people- "
"Awkward?" Kira echoed his words hollowly. "You're going to let your relationship fall apart... because you feel awkward?"
"It's not that simple."
"Yes, Lee, it is!" cried Kira, jumping to her feet and rounding on him, her eyes blazing. "These things are very simple! Tell me how you feel about Madeleine!"
He blinked. "You know how I feel about her!"
"That's not an answer!"
"I..." Words failed him.
"There it is again, that awkwardness," muttered Kira darkly. "Ever heard of seizing the day? Just... going out into the world and taking control?"
"Yes. But it's hard."
"It doesn't have to be. You're the one making things difficult for yourself. You're both doing it- slinking around, making stupid accusations and arguing over trivial things because you won't face up to each other, and how you feel!"
There was a sudden silence. Kira presently became aware of how fast she was breathing, as though she'd just ran around the lake three or four times. Lee's head was bowed, his expression as unfathomable as ever. The seconds ticked by.
2... 4...6... 10... 20...
His head moved upwards; his blue eyes strangely dark in the flickering firelight.
"You're right," he said hoarsely. "I'm so stupid."
Kira felt a knot untie itself in her stomach. "You are."
"She's not... Levi doesn't...?"
"I doubt it," smiled Kira. "You should give her a chance."
Lee smiled back. "Thanks, Kira."
She pulled him to his feet, giving him a quick hug. "Any time."
"Tea time," he laughed. "C'mon, let's go..."
She nodded, and followed him out of the Common Room and downstairs.
If Deron's philosophy in life worked for him- for them- there was no reason why it shouldn't work out for Madeleine and Lee. A few nights ago, Madeleine had returned her question, asking Kira if she believed in soulmates. She still wasn't entirely sure of her answer, but she knew one thing.
With a bit of effort, and the odd helping hand, Madeleine and Lee could be it.
